For someone who likes organizing, I'm not a particularly organized person. Oh, sure, I like the fou-fou labeling and 43 Folders and fetish trips to Office Depot aspects of it, but all of that is window dressing belying my real status as Queen of Mt. Perilous, that towering stack of unknown "to-be-handled" paper that I never, ever seem to be able to reverse-traverse my way to the bottom of.
I paid Asshole Tax last month, though, in triplicate (dinged thrice for automatic transfer of funds to cover payments out of checking) which so disgusted me, I made an appointment with my tax preparer for this coming Monday, which for me is the economic equivalent of throwing a party to make oneself clean the house. I have a high tolerance for nagging guilt (half-Jewish + raised Catholic = guilt bonanza) but an extremely low tolerance for wasting money. In fact, the only time I can take it is when I'm really sick, really tired, or on vacation. And, if the pricing on Tylenol in Las Vegas hotel gift shops is any indication, I am not alone in this.
But something has got to give. Despite my well-nurtured (but probably innate) bent for overachievement, I cannot, it is clear, do it all. And I'm of the belief that one can really only commit to three projects really well at any given time. Why three, I don't know. But I've tried four, and I think it goes without saying that I've tried five to fifty-six, and really, three is the limit. Whether or not you have any kind of a life worth living outside of your to-do list, which, God willin' and the creek don't rise, I'll continue to enjoy.
So I'm starting right now. Instead of going to 43 Things and doing it, I'm going to out myself here. My three things. Bam, bam, bam: laserlike focus, until they're done (or done enough) or i've decided they're done (as opposed to defaulting into discarding them). Previously, my Three Things have included such super-fun tasks as...
- Write screenplay.
- Find attorney.
- Get rid of horrible rash on face.
or...
- Get well.
- Put on weight.
- Get off of medication.
But I have never, to my knowledge, made "Get house in order" one of the three things. So here we (gulp) go:
- Finish pilot presentation for "#1 & #2".
- Achieve reasonable proficiency on piano and guitar.
- Get house in order.
I realize that #3, the thing that's kicking "Blog every day" off of the list, is kind of a gigantic, squishy catch-all, especially when compared to (hey!) #1 & #2. I suppose it's just such an intensely personal batch of items that I'm a little uncomfortable sharing it with all 47 of you. But Mt. Perilous is first, to be immediately (and I mean IMMEDIATELY) followed by tax prep. After that, I'll see what I feel is appropriate for public consumption. Who knows? Maybe I'll end up making my whole process public, like Evelyn is so bravely doing.
But what I am definitely doing is giving myself permission to be less than perfect here. As communicatrix, the Blog, serves communicatrix, the Vastly Flawed Human Being, I'll employ it, in service of this task, or as occasional diversion. Just maybe not as often. And maybe not as deeply.
Or who knows? Maybe it'll be deeper and richer and better than ever.
Let's see where the journey takes us.
xxx c